I am a day away from my first day of my new job. I start tomorrow and I got the scared feeling in my stomach like the first day of school feeling. Not because of it being my first day of work, but more so for my daughter and it being her first day of day care. She will be around new people and kids (which she is not yet use to), although thank God my cousin Melodie is the one who owns this day care and Aaliyah will be with family. Because I can't see myself putting Aaliyah in any other day care. I remember when my aunt Rita use to watch me for my parents when they use to work, back when we all lived in Oshawa Ontario and I use to get scared as soon as my parents would leave. I always thought they would not come back for me, but at the end of the day it was a relief when they would walk in the door after work to come pick me up. It is funny, because I knew they would come, but that fear always crept in when they left every day.
I just don't want my Aaliyah to feel the same way. I hope that she knows that we will not leave her ever. And hopefully she will notice the pattern of us coming back at the end of the day.
I am kind of sad that I had to get a job, because it will take away from my writting and my daughter, but a regular pay cheque is what we need right now more than anything.
Lets hope that by this time next year that we will have things in a nice orderly fashion.
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