Edward or Jacob

So as you already see my topic is about Edward and Jacob of course, but I just can't help  but write about it.
I know that all the bloggers on here may have their blogs about it, but I think mine may be a bit more intriguing. My reason being for that is the following. Okay so we got Twilight the first book and movie. We have our adorable Edward so charming and sweet and also might I ad the picture perfect boyfriend we all would love to have as our own. So you see when I watched and read twilight I  minus Bella and vision me as in her place. So for as twilight goes I am TEAM EDWARD. Because he treats ME (not Bella) so awesome in OUR relationship. Now onto New Moon, I love Edward a lot until MY birthday in the movie (not Bella's) because the day after he breaks up with me. Although I do realize he was only leaving me/Bella for OUR protection, but not only did I stop being team edward , Edward pushed Bella/ME into Jacob's arms, by not being around. So I fell for Jacob in New Moon. Not only because he was hotter than he was in twilight, but because he helped heal Bella/ME through out the time of depression. So my choice has jumped from Team Edward to Team Jacob. So here we have Eclipse. So I am kind of playing both sides I really love Edward and Jacob. Although I don't fully trust Edward since he left Bella and myself. So because he left Bella  has this unavoidable bond between Jacob that just can not be undone now. I do not like the way Jacob is being a jerk in eclipse, but however I see where he is coming from. He loves Bella, but some times I feel his rudeness is uncalled for.. So here I am stuck between the two in eclipse and just can't chose although I more so chose Edward over Jacob, but will not make the decision definite at this point. So we have breaking dawn which is not yet done as a movie yet, but at this particular moment is being filmed. I did read the book so my view on the last novel is I am totally stuck even more between the two because they both genuinely care and it is hard to just to chose. For some reasons I chose Edward, but than for others I chose Jacob. We all know Bella picks Edward in the end, but for some reason I am still undecided. I want them both, but still more Edward than Jacob. So that is how I view it. I put my self as Bella's character. It almost feels like you when you read this novels and it really cuts deep when Edward leaves Me/Bella in New Moon, because with my imaginary mind reading and taking it all in I don''t vision Bella there at all. I vision myself. If what I am talking about makes any sense. So here it is Team EDWARD. Only because we can live on forever, and some day Jacob will die and Edward will not.